Jesus Talked to Me Tonight

The evening went pretty normal tonight. We had dinner, relaxed for a bit, then we went up to put our little Joy to bed. We played quietly on the bed and then she crawled around on the floor while Michael Card's "Sleep Sound In Jesus" played quietly in the background. At about 7:15 we undressed her and went into the bathroom to give her a bath. But when we pulled back the shower curtain, we found a surprise: almost the entire floor of the tub was coated in some sort of black gunk! It was not just a thin coat, it was caked on and disgusting. Hannah tried rinsing it off, but it was no use. So she pulled out the scrubbing bubbles but they could not cut all the way through. Then she pulled out Soft Scrub and scrubbed the tub down again, this time successfully getting the tub clean. But of course the gunk had clogged the drain by then so it took a matter of minutes for the dirty water to drain. Then Hannah rinsed the bottom a few more times until it was finally ready. Ugh.

I got so angry. What kind of immature bum would do something like this! I told Hannah, "Imagine what your dad would have done if he saw this!" We knew it was Sam pretty much from the beginning, but after checking with her mother we knew it for sure. Later we found out he had cleaned his air conditioner filter in the tub, which is what caused the mess.

Well, after the bath and a treatment of drain-o, I was in a pretty bad mood. What was he thinking! How could any grown person do something like that! Those feeling just boiled in me. Then when Hannah got into bed, I jumped in the shower. As the warm water relaxed my muscles, I fell into a sort of meditative state. When my mind was totally clear and all I could think of was the feel of the water, Jesus said to me, "How can you forgive so little when you have been forgiven so much?" and then "I desire mercy, and not sacrifice."

Wow, quite a shot to the heart. In that moment, the parable of the unmerciful servant came into my mind and I knew I was wrong. Then the strength of the second part hit me, I can be pious and read my Bible and do all the right Christian things, but if I am not willing to forgive Sam of this little thing, it is all absolutely nothing. That stuck in my head as I finished my shower and got into bed with Hannah. So I repented to God for my wrong and the anger left me almost instantly and I was able to forgive Sam in my heart. But it really blows me away how easy it is to let human nature take control. In one moment I can be doing so well, and then suddenly somthing happens and everything right goes out the door and I am just a ball of sinful human nature.

But praise Jesus that He is so faithful and forgiving. In His grace He pointed out to me where I was wrong and helped me to do what was right.

Thank You Jesus :-).